in seventh grade I’d just become aware

boys

friends with more appeal

more attention

more attraction

more boys

she road next to me traffic slow confining

we rode our bikes to and from always nothing new

hit she fell I jumped

wrist trapped

she was following me survivor guilt attention envy

pull forward shouted to the woman shaken terrified

how could she be anything else

lying there none the wiser

unconscious of course I know now

the boy I cried onto the shoulder of kind enough to stand and accept my guile

overplaying the trauma for the sake of attention

from a boy

my life one long angst for this were that it ever came from the place originally needed

none of this would have happened

maybe I’d have become

different