I can’t make myself believe in a God the way they’d like me

preached in their way

ruled and lined up tight only one

direction to travel

leming

sheep

goat

human

so short sighted I feel a need to rail and throw barbs my face growing hot with

desire to scald their word(lessly)-filled tongues

have mercy

they take others with them too dear lord

there are no words

I don’t go to them for answers

I’m 55; I’ve tried

the road is not hidden nor is it narrow

neither is it paved in gold

there is something without the microphoned words and over-amped songs

a something that stretches mysteriously

invisibly?

delicately

beyond the suit that is seen

in memoirs and dairies

journals and poems scribed by the legends living out their self like you

like I

until the frustration of perfections unattainment takes them out

they talk to themself

or God you choose

in a way that

just makes sense

cancel the church service

let fall open a poem a journal a diary a memoir

touching the earth

for life